Today I´ve been sitting here in front of my computer all day long. I´ve written the last chapter of my story, but it in´t as good as it sounds. At the beginning I wrote the full story, just a few lines in every chapter. Slowly I´ve been filling them out, and today I finished the last chapter of the book. I still have four chapters to write.
I´m floating around between the deepest valleys and the highest mountains during my writing process. Sometimes it feels as I´v written something really bad, other times I can almost see the Nobel Prize in my hand. Most likely what I´ve written is something in-between the two of them.
Most of all I need space. I need space to write and time to write. Me and my husband are sitting next to each other, our desks being side by side. He loves to dig the music while playing around with his computer! Sometimes I also listen to music, but our taste is so different. And sometimes I really need the world to shut up!
It might sound bad when I´m saying I need more time to write. I´ve been at home for five years doing nothing else than writing. That´s a luxury! But in just three weeks I´m back to school to improve my math and natural science. It´s a school for adults, and next autumn I´m supposed to go back to university for a new education. It will take me three year in university – full time. I need a new education, since I cannot use the one I have – as a social worker – since I got sick out of stress. What will happen to my writing then?
I´ll already be done with my book then, I hope. At least the one I´m working at for the moment. But my experience tells me that any academic education kills everything within then human being that is natural, passionate and full of joy.
Am I wrong?